101: Dialogue Mechanics
Strong dialogue isn’t just about the words being said—it’s also about how those words are presented on the page.
If you’re newer to writing, there’s a lot to learn about storytelling—from big-picture techniques like show-don’t-tell to the more foundational aspects surrounding punctuation and capitalization. The technical part of writing isn’t very sexy, so we don’t talk much about it. But knowing those basics is super important if we want to write stories that contribute to the reader’s experience instead of interfering with it. And Angela and I want to make sure Writers Helping Writers offers help for authors at all stages and experience levels.
So today I’m starting a new 101 Series surrounding the foundational skills I see writers struggling with the most. Each post will cover a key element of fiction writing, and we’re starting off with dialogue mechanics—because even the most interesting conversations can fall flat if they aren’t written correctly. Poorly drafted dialogue can make the writing clunky, drag the pace, or cause confusion for readers, all of which can pull them out of the story. And no one wants that.
If you’ve ever struggled with where the punctuation goes (inside or outside the quotes?), when to use a comma vs. a period, or when to start a new paragraph in a scene of dialogue, you’re not alone, and this post is for you.
A Few Definitions
Before getting into the common dialogue mistakes, let’s identify three key elements of any good written conversation.
- Dialogue: The actual words spoken by a character. (“I can’t believe it.“)
- Dialogue Tag: A phrase that identifies the speaker. (“I can’t believe it,” she said.)
- Dialogue Beat: An action that accompanies the words being spoken. (“I can’t believe it.” Becca threw the bag of chips in the trash.)
Tags and beats are important because they’re a vital part of our real-life conversations. Including them breaks up the dialogue, creates rhythm, clarifies for readers who’s saying what, and makes the interaction between characters more authentic.
Now that we’re clear on the terminology associated with a passage of dialogue, let’s talk about the familiar stumbling blocks.
1. Proper Punctuation and Capitalization
First, always use double quotes for dialogue. Single quotes have their own purpose, but they shouldn’t be used as the main marks for dialogue.
When it comes to the rest of the punctuation for a line of dialogue…well, that depends on the sentence structure.
Complete Sentences with Tags
We know a complete sentence has a subject and verb that conveys a complete thought. In dialogue, you can determine if the sentence is complete by removing the tag or beat and just looking at the words inside the quotation marks.
When a complete sentence of dialogue is accompanied by a tag, the sentence should be punctuated as follows:
“I love these chips,” she said.
Because the tag is part of the sentence, the period goes at the end, after “said.” The dialogue portion ends with a comma (since it’s not the end of the sentence yet), and the tag begins with a lowercase letter because it’s in the middle of the sentence.
If the dialogue consists of a question instead of a statement, use a question mark instead of a comma inside the quotation marks. The period still goes at the end. And if you’re using someone’s name instead of a pronoun, it should be obviously capitalized.
“Do you like pickle chips?” Angela asked.
“Pickle chips make me barf,” Becca said.
A Complete Sentence with the Tag in the Middle
If a dialogue tag comes in the middle of a sentence, treat it as an interruption to the complete sentence, and use commas to separate it:
“I think,” Becca said, “barbecue flavor is the best.”
Note that the punctuation before the closing quotation mark in each segment is inside the marks. Also, because this is one complete sentence, the only capital letter is at the beginning.
Sentences with Beats Instead of Tags
Beats are meant to stand alone and should usually be written in complete sentences themselves.
Angela shook her head. “I really don’t understand you.”
The beat is a complete sentence, and so is the dialogue. So both elements start with a capital and end with a period (or question mark or exclamation point as needed).
2. A Word About Thoughts
While we’re talking about different kinds of dialogue, let’s look quickly at thoughts. Because they aren’t spoken, they shouldn’t have quotation marks. However, the formatting is different depending on whether the thought is direct or indirect.
Direct Thoughts capture the character’s exact thoughts and are always italicized. Notice that any tags aren’t italicized (because the tag isn’t part of the character’s actual thought).
Please, no more, I thought.
Enough with the dad jokes.
Indirect Thoughts summarize what the character is thinking. Because they’re not exact thoughts, they aren’t italicized and are formatted like regular text.
She thought he was quite tasty.
He really hoped she wasn’t interested in him that way.
3. When Should a New Paragraph Start?
A common area of struggle in dialogue is knowing when to start a new paragraph. It’s an important question because if we get this wrong, the reader is confused about who’s saying and doing what:
“No car for a week?” Ivy’s voice squeaked into the stratosphere. “That’s ridiculous!” her brother said. “Everybody just calm down.”
But when we start a new paragraph each time the speaker changes, things become much clearer.
“No car for a week?” Ivy’s voice squeaked into the stratosphere.
“That’s ridiculous!” Jacob said.
“Everybody just calm down.”
This rule holds true for beats, too. If Character 2 does something while Character 1 is talking, that action needs to go into its own paragraph.
“So I hit a mailbox,” Ivy said. “Also, the shepherd in the church’s nativity scene is now sheep-less.”
Her mother closed her eyes and drew in a deep breath.
“And I may have taken out Mr. Henderson’s azaleas—but that totally wasn’t my fault!”
4. Interruptions and Hesitations
Real-life dialogue is full of interruptions, stops and starts, and people talking over each other. Your characters’ conversations should be no different. Luckily, the punctuation for each of these is pretty simple.
Use Em Dashes for Interruptions
When your character’s being interrupted, use an em dash (—) inside the quotation marks to show their words are being cut off. This is true whether the interruption comes in the form of someone’s words or actions.
Her mom’s eyebrows shot upward. “The azaleas? Ivy—”
“It was a squirrel,” Jacob sputtered. “A deranged, kamikaze squirrel that fell out of a tree and stumbled right into the road. It was rabid, foaming at the mouth—”
Ivy shoved him. “You’re not helping.”
Use an Ellipse for Hesitations
Interruptions indicate a clean break, with the person’s speech abruptly stopping. Hesitations are more, well…hesitant. If there’s a pause in your character’s speech, or if their dialogue trails off slowly rather than bluntly, use an ellipse.
“Seemed deranged,” Jacob mumbled. “Stumbling…middle of traffic…” He rubbed the back of his neck and decided Ivy could fight her own battles.
Clean Dialogue Makes for Stronger Writing and Easier Reading
The mechanics of dialogue may not be the most exciting thing to study but mastering them makes your story easier to read and understand. The good news is that, like most elements of writing, the more you incorporate proper punctuation, capitalization, and paragraphing into your dialogue, the easier it gets. Then you can move on to higher level techniques that will make your characters’ conversations authentic, engaging, and full of added depth—techniques that we’ll discuss in our next 101 post.
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